Ten Things You Need To Know Before You Go To A Hospital...

    Greetings good people.  So, before I get rolling on this post I need to basically disclaim the hell out of it.  First, this applies to no specific hospital and is not intended to do so.  Secondly, this is primarily limited to personal knowledge and experiential anecdote.  Thirdly, since I have had the good fortune to be relatively healthy and not have seek care out of state, by knowledge is based in the Northeastern United States.  Last and final disclaimer--"this information is not intended to treat, diagnose or resolve any medical issue."   Please note that these items are in no particular order. That being said, let's get it:

     

     1.  DO NOT LIE ABOUT YOUR WEIGHT.  Many medications, especially those for pain are dosed by weight.  That ten pounds you knock off could make a difference.

    2.  There is a difference between "treatment" and "care".  While the public may use these interchangeably they are different.  While they may date they are two different animals.  "Treatment" has to do what tools are at the disposal of the physician, nurse or other medical team member to resolve, fix or stabilize your condition.  "Care" has to do with the administration of the previously mentioned "treatment."  You are entitled to "stabilizing treatment" in the state of New York without regard to whether or not you are insured.

    3.  Know these key terms associated with an emergency visit or hospitalization.  "BIBEMS"- is BROUGHT IN BY EMS.  NPO IS LATIN FOR NIL PER OS. (literally, nothing by mouth)  THAT MEANS YOU CAN'T EAT ANYTHING. Also understand that two, three, and four times a day is different than every twelve, every eight and every six hours. 

   4.  Insist that all staff identify themselves by name and department or service.  While there might be 11 doctors named "Lisa". There are not 11 "Lisa's" on the Endocrine service.  This is to help you keep track of your care and to clearly identify if you get conflicting messages.  For example, one person can say you can eat while the surgeon will not hear of it. This leads into number 4 quite nicely...

   5.  Don't assume that the doctors are talking to each other at the very beginning.  While you may see four different doctors, if they are responsible for different things they may not necessarily sit down until AFTER your treatment starts or when your aftercare starts.  Also, note that your

    6. Under no circumstances, where ever possible, should you go to the emergency room alone.  Sometimes a visit to the E.R. may require advocacy.  You may need someone else to inform the nurse that you are feeling worse than when you arrived.  How well or poorly you are doing can change where you are in the treatment queue.

    7.  Doctors travel in packs.  This is to a patient's benefit.  this way you will only be disturbed, mangled or annoyed once in the morning and once in the afternoon.  Generally, when doctors come to your bedside very early it is because they are handing you over to the next shift.  

     8.  Unless you are a patient, do not use the bathroom in the Emergency Room.  I am going to just ask that you trust and believe me on this without additional elaboration.

    9.  They are not ignoring your pain.  Hospitals in New York must assess your pain when you present for triage.  If they medicate your pain immediately, they may be unable to tell whether or not you are worsening in symptoms.  Where you have pain, what type of pain it is (radiating, stabbing, dull) and how severe are often good indicators of what is wrong with you.  They can't deaden your pain without knowing for sure what is causing it.

    10.  Do not avoiding seeking medical attention because you have no money or are not a citizen.  All hospitals have sliding scale payment plans and city hospitals have special programs for uninsured persons.  In most cases, if your require admittance the hospital fills out the paperwork for you because they want to get paid.

    While this is by no means a be all and end all list for consumers and readers it is a solid start.  Post any additional comments or concerns you may have in the comments section or feel free to inbox me.

What Sandy Taught Me...

    So, nearly a week after the worst storm I have ever lived through, my city is still picking up the pieces.  There are parts of my city that will be picking up the pieces for a long time and the emotional pieces forever.  I have learned a lot about the people around me and even more about myself.  Sandy barreled her way across the Northeast and left 115 people dead, billions in property damaged and countless lives affected.  Everyone will take away something different.  I need to write it down so I can get it out.

1. Storm tracking software has gotten a lot better.  In the early days of storm tracking models were off... way off.  The software has gotten better and so have the people using it.  Chances are more likely that the track being forecast is relatively accurate.
2. Other people panicking can be contagious.  So, on the Friday before the storm I went out to go food shopping.  It was my regular shopping day and time.  I do the middle of the night because it is easier and usually more well stocked than Saturday morning.  My first clue was the number of cars in the parking lot.  My third-space-in spot that I had grown accustomed to ended up being a rolling troll for someone coming out.  I found a space only to find that milk, eggs and bread were flying off the shelves.  At this point, I started to feel a little antsy and the nail in the coffin of panic was the lady in the overcoat passing out pamphlets proclaiming the "End of Days."
3. Your kids, no matter what age, think you are crazy.  My eldest son told me I was a "Doomsday Prepper."   The youngest simply wanted to remind me to bring cereal and Teddy Grahams.   Then I got street cred when the Governor started closing bridges.  I was glad he decided to ride out the storm with me and his little brother.  
4. Storms will bring out the best and worst in people.  Donating time, food, and money.  Price gouging, gas lines and meanness.  So, we all saw the destruction in Seaside Heights and Breezy Point and Far Rockaway.  We saw people mobilizing to help and and we saw people looting.  We saw stories of courage and we saw zealots say that it was the wrath of God.  I prefer to think it was a live re-enactment of the story of the Good Samaritan.  
5. People will no longer laugh when I call and say get cash and gasoline.  This is my typical phone call before any impending emergency.  I think it is important to be able to drive away and have money to go somewhere else.  
6. I cooked away my nerves.  So, I think my crew gained five pounds because I cooked and cooked and cooked.  It was therapeutic.
7. Get out when they say get out.  I think this goes without saying.  Some people have no place to leave to, be a neighbor and share if you can.  People don't leave because of all the false alarms in the past.  It is a new day.  The tech is better and faster.  Get out if they tell you to.  It may save your life.
8. Many of my Facebook friends are really good peoples.  The support and caring, the "east-coast-people-hit-me-up statuses, the come charge your phone statuses were all appreciated.  

    The final and most important thing that I learned is something I knew already but had to pause to remember.  My life is good.  I have a family.  I am loved.  I have some "things."  At the end of any day, it is good to be able to say that and have it be true.

A Word on Mothers' Day

  Let me start with the typical and much deserved Happy Mothers' Day.  I am very fortunate in that every day is mothers day for me.  I have children that tell me they love me on a regular basis.  So on this Mothers' Day I have come to grips with a simple fact.  My children have become exactly what I have been raising them to be all these years;  independent, free thinking compassionate people.  So, the free thinkers made other plans.  It is perhaps one of those sad but happy moments when you realize that you've taught something so well that you are not needed to reinforce the lesson. 

    It is a good although sad space to be in.  I am one for three on children this year.   I spent my day with the little guy.  It was quiet and loving and it made me miss the raucousness of Mothers' Days gone by.  So, on this Mothers' Day let's pause to think of all the women who are spending their first holiday as moms, without their moms expecting to be moms and a special shout out to women who do mom things for other people's children. So, by now your food is settling and you are prepping for another week.  Pat yourself on the back if you have ever nurtured a person or an idea. 

    Thank you to all the people who have loved, supported and nurtured me.  I won't name you individually because I may miss someone.  Happy Mothers' Day.

Lean Right or "Please Step Away From My Uterus..."

  I will make a solid effort to keep this from becoming a full on rant but if it slips into that please forgive me. At this point, the issue is no longer abortion or reproductive rights.  The nation that we live in is trying to take a giant step to the right--the right wing.  Now, I've posted about here the whole post-racial thing.  We are slipping off the effing cliff here people.  Rich people are claiming that the rest of the population is waging class warfare.   All while they are trying to bust unions, suppress the vote and show general disdain and disrespect for the Office of the President, in large part because it is occupied by a man of color.  

    In the midst of all of that, Republicans turned an employment issue into a religious issue while trying to do the very same thing they accused the President of--forcing his political will on the masses.  So, you have a hearing on Capitol Hill about contraception and you don't allow anyone with a uterus and a brain to speak?  Really?  So, Catholic institutions shouldn't have to pay for contraception?  Seventh-Day Adventists have to offer patients meat and Jehovah's Witnesses can not exclude blood transfusions from covered medical expenses.  Some institutions were already covering it under their respective policies, most Catholics use it anyway and quietly stand against the Church's policy.  

   To further throw salt in the gender wound, enter stage left the state of Virginia.  Let me pause here to say that this especially hits me close because that is the state I have entrusted my daughter to.  Please don't make me come the hell down there.  They wanted to require every woman seeking an abortion to to take a trans-vaginal ultrasound.  This is the tool they use to perform them.  As a woman that has had one in the past, let me remove all doubt--THEY ARE INVASIVE.  Not the kind ot "tool" you want in your vajayjay.  I had several of these during my pregnancies and the tool coupled with positioning is very invasive.  I am still trying to figure out the ultra-conservative right can be against birth control, abortion and single mothers all at the same time.  If you allow women access to birth control it reduces the likelihood that they will need abortions or become single parents.  It took me a minute to reason that out so what can't the Republican presidential field?  
     The saddest part of this entire shift away from reproductive rights is the fact that it only further marginalizes people who were marginalized to begin with.  Thank you to every legislator--with cahones and without--that have stood up to protect women across the nation.  
       As a woman, you need to be figuring out how to get in this fight before it isn't a fight anymore.  Back in the day we used to say "Protect Ya Neck" now it's "Protect ya Womb.  Scary.

Doomsday Preppers

    I tell you, burning the wee-hours-of-the-morning-oil has some unique and previously hidden experiences.  For all I know this show comes on in prime time. Let me be honest, initially I thought "Great, some backwoods mofos with money playing survivalist."  Then several things occurred to me and I ended up here to tell you about them.  

    I fault no one for their choice of lifestyle.  There are many things that we do that other people look at with incredulity.  At first blush, I dismissed the whole concept--and for the most part I still do.  In many ways, the whole movement makes me sad.  As a parent, I will fiercely protect my children.  I mean like Taken style protect my kids.  I mean Ashley Judd Missing style protect my kids.  That being said, I'm not sure if training them to believe that some catastrophic event will befall them and then have them live in preparation for it, qualifies as protection.  How do they form solid bonds with others if they believe that the end is coming and everyone is the enemy?

    I also had to gut check myself and wonder what if they are absolutely right?  Then I thought about the hording behavior and the obsession and it occurred to me, that the ends don't really justify the means.  I love the capitalistic nature of enterprising individuals.  There is an entire market of stuff dedicated to these folks.  Bunkers, booby traps, guns, EM pulse protectors, MRE rations.  All kinds of shit.  It's actually amazing when you think about it.  What happens when you discover that you've spent all your money on an underground bunker and in order to survive you have to stay above ground?  

    The take away for me is that I don't think I am an "End Of Days" kinda girl.  I have no real interest in waiting out a nuclear winter or living post EM pulse--my phone and tech would be useless.  How would I blog?  If you have a year's worth of food in your garage then I hope you share when the time comes.  Get it done.

Life in an Allegedly Post Racial America or "Why You Mad For Though?..."

    So, when I started this blog I indicated that it would be subject to random musing.  Well, it's a random musing kind of day.  Let me start with the disclaimer.  This is just how I feel.  I do not purport to speak for anyone other than myself.  So, that being said...leggo...

   "Post Racial America" is a liberal guy's wet dream and a reactionary's nightmare.  I live here and I can tell you it isn't post-racial at all. I would actually suggest that with an African American POTUS that things are more racial than ever.  I am secretly enjoying watching the person reading over my shoulder cringe with disdain.  Well, not so secret anymore.  Here in the supposedly post racial belly of the beast--Harlem--I am painfully aware of the shifts, changes and growing pains.  

   

     Start with the fact that I am sitting in a Starbucks that up until two years ago was a vacant, undeveloped patch of dirt, enjoying a Breve Mistto.  My shameless treat to myself on the one day a month I arrive in the city four hours before I need to because the kid needs an education. Now, I am not sure what purpose Starbucks serves in other communities.  I know here in Harlem it is more like a community hub than anything else.  People bring their coffee and buy cake in an effort to satisfy the cultural conditioning that you can't sit some place where you didn't buy anything.  Prior to Magic Johnson, Starbucks was notorious for avoiding communities of color.  In many ways, it was the floodgate.  Following them was Bank of America, MAC, Chase and Aerosoles just to name a few.

    That's a  grassroots look.  On a broader national scale we post the articles highlighting this "racially insensitive" or that flat out bigoted statement.  I think my surprise is about the fact that people are still surprised that a portion of the nation still hates me because of my skin.  And why shouldn't they?  Newt Gingrich tells them that I have no role models and live on food stamps.  Anne Coulter tells them that "their blacks are better."  Sean Hannity tells them that the President that looks like me is an "appeaser" and on top of all that Rush Limbaugh says that the nation should fail.  So, if I didn't have a healthy sense of self -esteem or if I believed every drug addicted racist with a media outlet I would be fucked.  

    My grandfather--God rest his soul--used to say "Never be mad when people tell you who they are up front..."  Could not have possibly gotten more sage advice from anyone.  We have a political party that has moved so far to the right that even its base is wondering "WTF?"  We have had senators and congressman say all kinds of outrageous stuff about and to the President.  There is a subconscious portion of the Caucasian psyche--in some--that believes that he is somehow undeserving of the post he was elected to.  Please note that he was elected by the nation not solely by minorities.

  Be grateful that you are painfully aware of who is influencing minds and winning hearts.  The likely nominee for the Republican nomination is a man who put his dog on the roof of a van and offered to place a $10,000 bet.  When was the last time you bet 1o large on ANYTHING?  Shoot, when was the last time you had 10 large period?  The very same gentleman who said he wasn't concerned about the poor and was a staunch opponent of the auto industry bailout, and simply can't be human enough to say "Wow, I was wrong about that." ?  Scary. 

    Pay attention people.  You are in on the ground floor of the human rights rollback.  Voter suppression is at an all time high.  Reactionary talk radio is at an all time high.  Newt Gingrich says your 10 year old should sweep the school in tribute for his education.  Mitt Romney believes that we should be looking for engineering talent abroad while he fails to fund talented students here at home.  Rick Santorum stated that he is not opposed to racial profiling.  Rich people are complaining about class warfare.  Enough already, my ears are bleeding.

   If you aren't thinking about what to do to combat the coming wave of anti-everything-but-me then you have cahones like bowling balls and good luck to you.  For those of us who are more real world based, we need to start planning.  The revolution will not be televised--maybe tweeted--or posted--but not televised.  Get it done.

   

The Case for Workplace Cooperation or "You Don't REALLY Have to Be That Bitch"

     As the economy continues to change so does business.  As I proceed, I do realize that there are some people who work in a Corporate Utopia and will not be able to relate to what I am talking about.  As I get older, I do a lot of thinking about my path and how the path I planned wasn't necessarily the one I walked.  There are days when this bit of wondering consumes me and other days where it matters not at all.  As I observe the world around me I acknowledge several things.

     I observe often.  I assess a lot.  I muse with impunity.  I piss people off sometimes because I tend to do these things openly, without remorse.  The fact of the matter is that I have always believed that where work and women intersect can be one of the most dangerous and difficult places to navigate.  I have lived to survive it thus far.Let me pause here to say that I am a woman in the workplace.  While my journey wasn't the one I expected--it has been interesting. 

      I have a lot of respect for how men move with each other in the workplace--and I will come back to this in a moment.  It may be as complex as a double helix or as simple as warm apple pie.  This is not a comparison or "who's-better-us-or-them" piece.  As an African American woman in the workplace I think we would benefit from supporting each other in the workplace.  We hear that "Girls Rule the World" and "Black Girls Rock".  Girls will rule your future and black girls will rock your knot if they believe you are interfering with their road to the corporate tower of light.

    As much as women have better choices and less sacrifice than they did even fifteen or twenty years ago they have the same choices and the same sacrifices.  Women still face the baby now or wait dilemma.  We still have the not-paid-as-much-as-men issue although the gap has closed slightly. 

    So, why do we chew each other up and spit each other out?  I'm sure that the reasons vary as much as the people who have them.  Everything from undiagnosed psychiatric illnesses to trust issues to family pedigree. I have always been of the mind that content people are more productive.  Sometimes it is a vague as "I just don't like her..." or as specific as some perceived or actual wrong in the past.  Why does it all matter anyway?

    The Corporate workplace is changing.  The job market is ever evolving as are the people seeking jobs.  In this day and age the person you cross today could be the person you are interviewing with tomorrow.  It is always better to build bridges than to burn them?  Something to think about.